He Spoke to me that Night
As I sat there crying, asking God, why?
He said…
“I was just a poor boy
Nobody loved me
Like an orphan running the streets
Dirty and ugly
Is what they all told me
Left all alone, all by myself
No father and a mother who was depressed and broken
Until the day she took her last breath
Nobody taught me
Had to fend for myself
As oppression set in
Now I’m all grown up
Working my day job
Still all alone
Lonely and depressed
Never knowing who I was
Or what I would become
I had a daughter
So beautiful and talented
She could sing just like her dear old Dad
Music became "our" special bond
We sang and we sang until our hearts bled red
Crimson and rose so lovely
But then she grew up and alone again I became
Then I got remarried
After years of just dating
Just like the wind she was
Exciting and new
We had such passion
But it too blew out, the flame
Too dysfunctional, screaming match
Couldn't cope
Never stood a chance
Alone I was once more, and again
I sat on that mound of salt and looked at my life as I asked God these questions
Why am I like this?
Why is this my life?
There’s nothing left here for me now
Nobody loves me
I’m all alone just like I was when just a boy
So I left my body and my daughter thinking she was better off
I walked away not knowing there could be any other way
No one needed me here
Just to continue to dim their light
And I never found my way
But you can my darling
In my leaving I left you with this gift
You may not see it yet
But I know it’s with you
In your heart
I’ll walk with you once more into the sunset
My darling sweet daughter
You were my whole life
My one true source of delight
I am so proud of you
Look at all you’ve become
All you’ve accomplished
I see in you what I couldn’t ever see in myself
You will live a good life
Just as I hoped for you
You are a true source of love
Compassionate and genuine
Showing what’s possible
An example, a role model
To see through with eyes of love
Fear not the unknown
My love for you will never die
Look for me and I’ll be right by your side
Take my hand and we will dance again
Just like we did on your sweet wedding day
On the other side of you I was
With your other father
Just like you always dreamed
To have us both walk with you on that very special day
I wouldn’t have missed it for the world
You may not have seen me but I know you felt me there with you
In truth I’ve never left your side
Loving you but from the other side
Guiding you and showing you
Living a life alone was just a lie I told myself
As my delusions set in.”
Poem written by Alejandra Marie